Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

How did Nickelback gain a large fan base despite criticism of their music?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy bullshit

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When will dating stop being so hard for Gen Z?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I can read

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

What kind of lights would you like to use for your home decor?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I can count

My ex got into a relationship within 2 weeks after a breakup. What should I do?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Why did I move on so fast from a relationship that was my whole life and I was so attached, I moved on by 2 months?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

If you’re an atheist, what would be your motive in spreading atheism, and why would you care what others believe?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Cliffhanger's Black Panther game reportedly would have built upon the famously patented Nemesis System - Rock Paper Shotgun

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

What makes someone feel "rich enough" in different societies?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Atheists, there is a god up there in heaven and he loves you so much that he sent his son to die the worst death imaginable and then to turn into a zombie all to save you from sin. Why do you reject him?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

How is bestiality wrong, but killing animals for sport or trophies is considered okay?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

How do I find a transgender girlfriend?

I actually pay taxes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I have a reading level above third grade

What is the opposite personality type of someone with ASPD (antisocial personality disorder)?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t cotton to rapists

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I see through liars

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t